Ash and Jessie Both Suck At Acting: Pewter City Lab Pt 7

Chapter VII: A Tangy Victory

Jesse/Ash fell to the ground.

Oh. He died. Guess the story is over then.

“Ahh! Jessie are you okay?” James and Meowth said tring to wake him up. 

It worked! Ash thought to himself.

James: Hey, Jessie didn’t faint like a girl at all! WE’VE BEEN TRICKED! :icononionnouplz: 

Ash pretaned to wake up. 

“Oh, few! We thought we lost you!” James said nerously. [“We were unbelievably happy for a second… not because we thought you were dead! It was… for some other… reason…”]

“Where am I?” Ash acted. 

“At our cabin in the woods.” Meowth answered. 

“Oh, how did I get here?” Ash asked meanly [Meanly? How can you ask meanly? Ash: TELL ME HOW I GOT HERE NOW, MAGGOTS!! PLEEEEEASE!!!] (still acting) [Because we might have thought he stopped. :roll:]

“We took you here! What was the last thing you rember?” James asked. 

Ash was afried they would ask that. Leave it to James to think it up.

There’s a simple answer to this question. But I don’t think Mr. Doesn’t-Know-Boys-and-Girls-Pass-Out-The-Same-Way is clever enough to think of it. He could just pretend he doesn’t remember anything

“Um, I rember chasing that brat,” Ash stoped.

Or you could do that. That’s fine too.

His (or was it Jessie’s?) heart started pounding.

Since you are in Jessie’s body, I’m going with Jessie’s heart.

Is that what she calls me or is it twrip?

Actually I think she calls you Twerp. Or go with Turnip. That’s closer to the spelling you were going for.

Ash screamed in his head. [Ash–> :iconheadacheplz:]

“Go on.” Meowth said breaking Ash’s thoughts.

Team Rocket is just that dumb. Well… they did fall for the pretend fainting fit.


Ash/Jessie sat nervously on the hospital bed.

Okay, we are back to Jessie. Or Jessie inside Ash as it were… This story just makes every sentence I write seem wrong.

Doctors were all around her. She looked at her hands. No! Could it be? [These chunky trunk-bits can’t be mine! They aren’t even properly manicured!] Jessie thought. She got out of bed, the Doctor eyes followed her.

These doctors seem to have a striking resemblance to a certain collection of ponyo nurses from the future.


They’re back?

She looked into the mirror. 

“AHHH!” Jessie screamed at her refettion. [Her what?Ash! Jessie fell to the ground, out cold.

Now that’s how you pass out girl style, Ash. Jessie’s a born pro. Or rather… you are. Gah! Head hurting.


“I think we should find team twrips and get thier Pikachu!” Ash acted.

He’s a really bad actor.

He wondered if Pikachu would recoince him. But wether Pikachu did or didn’t he still had to find him. Jessie must be in his body and if that’s true. She has control of all his Poke’mon and maybe even Pikachu.

“We should also get in our Meowth Balloon and say our motto… that I can’t remember at the moment. But you start James and I will repeat after you. Man, I just love stealing pokemon. And our organization is the bomb. Yup, I’m Jessie alright. And  a girl too. With girl parts.”


“Me and Meowth put a tracking deive in Ash’s coat.

That’s convenient. If by deive I mean device. If not then… I have no idea what they put in his coat.

We will find him quick. He is now in the hospital.” James smiled. [“Kicking kids in wheelchairs is fun!”]

“Good, I sure there is alot of Poke’mon we can steal there.” Ash studdered.

They probably keep them all in nonsensical closets.

But all Ash had in mind to steal or in his case save was his poke’mon.


Jessie woke with hundreds of doctors all around her.

It’s the ponyo nurses’ male counterparts! Look out! They’ll eat your soul!!

She had to act like the twrip to get out of here. 

“Where am I?” Jessie asked in her most Ash like voice.

Apparently both Ash and Jessie think alike in acting like each other…

“Your in the hospital. Ash are you okay?” Misty said pushing her way through the crowd with Brock and Tokapi behind her. Pikachu leaped on Misty’s shoulder. 

“Fine but I feel funny,” Jessie acted. [“My voice hurts. How does Ash… I mean, how do I talk like this?”] In her mind she want to say: get away from me you swanny [:iconbellaplz:?] little brat, but then she would be taken to the ER for a Cat scan.

That’s a little dramatic. But Misty would certainly feel offended. I mean… being called Bella Swanny? That’s harsh.

“You acting very weird. You called yourself Jessie. And you told the doctors to Prepare for trouble while you were sleeping.” The Nurse said calmly.

Wow. Subtle.

“I don’t rember saying anything like that.” Jessie acted.

Nice save. Need to teach that one to Ash.

“You mind’s to small to rember anything.” James called behind them.

OH HO! BURN! :iconhandsomeonionplz:

“Hey!” The Ash in Jessie body said angrly, but then he regretted it.

Everyone is doing so well today. :roll:

“He wasn’t talking to you Jessie!” Meowth laughed. [“Silly girl. She’s been so mixed up since she breathed in those noxious fumes.” :icondontunderstandplz:]

“get ready to…” James started. Their was a silence. “Jessie!” James hissed. 

“I told you I not saying that stupid motto.”

:iconomgnoesplz: Le gasp! She insulted the motto! By Team Rocket laws then she must die!

The Ash in Jessie body yelled.

Why does this sound so wrong? :iconorzplz:

“Please Jessie, I can’t say it alone!” James begged. 

“Than don’t say it at all.

I guess Ash just gave up trying to pretend to be Jessie.

 It is a waste of time and it’s boreing.” The Ash in Jessie’s body snapped.


Jessie: :icononionnouplz: You take that back right now!!

“Ash and Jessie both are acting strange.” Brock wondered. [“What ho! My first speaking part for the past ten or so pages. Odd considering this story was supposed to be about my lab…”]

Pikachu bounced off Misty’s shoulder and into Jessie’s arms.


“Why are you going with the bad guys, Pikachu?” Misty yelled.

Pikachu: I’m after the boobies, of course. :iconbuzzrapefaceplz:


Pikachu leaped into Ash’s (or Jessie’s) arm. So Pikachu does know me, Ash smiled to himself.

Or he likes my new boobies. :iconshockedbuzzplz:

“Pikachu, what are you doing?” Misty asked again. 

Pikachu snugged in Ash’s (or Jessie’s) arms and refused to let go.

The boobies thing just seems more and more true, doesn’t it?

“Jessie come on! We have Pikachu.” Meowth said grabbing Ash’s (or [or this is getting old] Jessie’s) leg. Ash had had enough of acting like Jessie or tring to. [Or ultimately failing at, more like.] Ash kicked Meowth off his (or her) [sigh] leg. 

“I’m not Jessie! I’m Ash Katchem from pallet town!” Ash screamed.

Now would be a good time to give someone special a cat scan…

“You can’t be I’m Ash!” the Jessie in Ash’s body yelled. “from Palete town.”


“It’s pallet town!” Misty said to who seemed to be Ash.

Seemed not to be Ash anymore though.

“Ash would never forget the name of his home town [Unless he had severe brain trauma. Which a cat scan might help discover! and how did Jessie learn it!” Brock asked aloud. 

Well she could have looked it up on a map, honestly.

“I know this sounds crazy but I think Jessie is Ash and Ash is Jessie.” Misty said. 

“Correct!” Ash in Jessie’s body said happily.


“Wrong, wrong, wrong!” Jessie in Ash’s body yelled. The Jessie in Ash’s body cam up behind the Ash in her body and threw a net over him [The hell? Where did she get a net?] and Pikachu and then a separate net over the rest of the people in the room.

Apparently she planned this… while she was unconscious on a hospital bed.

“So long suckers!” Jessie in Ash’s body said runing off with Team Rocket [This is just too weird. :iconheadacheplz:] and Ash in Jessie’s body and Pikachu in the net being dragged behind.

So wait. What happened? I don’t understand!  :iconheadacheplz: :iconheadacheplz: :iconheadacheplz:


“Let us go!” the real Ash yelled.

No Ash in Jessie’s body anymore? Gotten kind of old hasn’t it?

“Hurry up Meowth and make that fomalu! [What? Fomalu? Was I even trying?] I want to get back into my body.” Jessie yelled. [“I sure hope no one heard me say that out loud. It could be taken so wrong…”]

James opened the cage and grabbed Ash or in his case Jessie. He forsed him into a chair and pried his mouth opened.

Whoa. Wait. Where the hell is this going? This seems to be heading in a rated R direction!

Meowth gave James and Jessie each a bottle of Blue liquid.


Ash stuggled but James poured it down his throt. It was a tany flavor, Ash hated it. Jessie gulped it down quickly. To her it tasted like vitory,[Victory tastes like tang.] she loved it.

Chemical abuse! Huzzah!

Ash and Jessie saw the world spin.

Next time on PCL, will Jessie and Ash regain their own bodies? Or will they die horribly after having just ingested a beaker of sodium hypochlorite. I’m voting for the latter. Oh and will the rest of the gang get out of the horrible net trap?

Seen here. 

 Will Brock ever get a speaking line again? Remember that lab plot? Yeah. What ever happened to that? Stay tuned!



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